This statement is true, whether it’s with clients, business networking colleagues, students, or even personal friends.
Self-recognition of this attitude became evident earlier this week while I was teaching at Columbia College. Throughout the course of the semester, I ask the students track their progress against their pre-established Public Speaking/Communications goals (which were assessed and determined during the first week of class).
We are now more than halfway through the semester, so I held one-on-one one-on-one progress meetings with each student in lieu of a regular class. This special effort is one in which the students receive personalized attention, and its an opportunity for the student and I to prioritize the highest and best areas of focus for that individual throughout our final weeks together.
Every semester, all of the students express gratitude at the chance to do this one-on-one session. Yet, I notice that their true level of effort to track their personal progress (as it translates to out-of-class communications) varies widely from student to student.
The winners: Some students were sincere in their reporting and analysis efforts—which involves reflecting upon the ‘gap’ between their original skill level upon entering class and their goals for the end of the semester. It also requires documenting oral communication experiences outside of our class to ensure progress is reflected into their everyday world.
Even though some of the sincere students are not necessarily the strongest speakers, nor will they get the highest grade in the class, I was most glad to dedicate extra time to them—above and beyond what was allocated—to help them succeed.
The losers: Other students were lame with their analysis efforts, and although at that moment they craved the extra time to see what they could do to improve their grade, I could plainly see that they were not worthy of the same amount of ‘tender loving care’ (TLC) compared to those that were fully sincere.
The bottom line: it’s in my nature to be abundantly accessible, helpful, strategic, and enthusiastic with people who are already applying great energy to help themselves. Those who do not use the resources provided to them, and who do not take it seriously except when they are right there on the spot—staring at me in the face—are not going to receive the same amount of accessibility and extra effort from me.
Why should they? I will not be able to help those who do not try/want to help themselves first.
Think about your own clients. Do they want to help themselves? Are their intentions on target for their particular project? Are they cooperating with you as architects/engineers/construction professionals to get the job done well? Have there been times when you found yourself favoring certain clients over others, because some of them *wanted it* more than others and were willing to go the extra mile for project success?